The Tale of How Queendom Came About

so, y’all know that human film, Inception?
well, that’s pretty much how Queendom came about.

here’s the story, perk your ears;

there was this girl, Liz, who was a human in her then current Cosmic Situation.
she went by her day, as we do.
she ticked off her human achievements – get born, be chill for 7 years, start a grab towards knowledge but with no formulated plan, get confused…

BEWILDERED.

that’s right – Liz was confused as fuck & she didn’t know whichwhatway.

thoughts were thought.
& thoughts became more thoughts.

&… then…

thoughts turned into Dreams.

Liz started building a world in her Mind.

[the Mind is a Transcendental Tool]

Landscapes started shaping – rolling hills of green, littered with flowers, colourful as sin & tall trees creaking with ancient wisdom.

all of a sudden there were footpaths on which horse-driven coaches delivered their guests unto valleys containing waterfalls, caves, streams & ample Mythological Life.

the Inhabitants of Queendom hailed themselves Euphorians, for indeed!
it was true –
Queendom was a place of happiness, unending!

then, of course, there was the mystical, glorious & ever so majestic Castle.

the Castle is a sight to behold –
several pointed towers beam through pale clouds in a still grasp towards the sky,
windows, slim & tinted with a colour like wine, act like eyes, knowing.
the grounds are green & filled with jest & extravagant winged creatures flying by & by.
then, there’s a room, oh so luxurious, where a Queen spends her time overlooking a Paradise, glowing.

make no mistake – every Euphorian living & serving [Serving Others Ensures A Humble Life] in Queendom lives in blissful luxury.
so, thus, the Castle contains many many many a room for Euphorians to exist peacefully & without disturbance.
HOWEVER, should a Euphorian feel so inclined to NOT stay in the Castle, they are toootally welcome as well.
that’s why there are a whole couple of villages within The Woods of Queendom.
each village has a tribe leader kinda guy/girl & Queen trusts them to manage themselves without her worrying too much about them.

i mean, that’s exactly how Queendom WORKS.
everyone functions on the knowledge that every single Euphorian is capable of looking after themselves.
it’s only when people are incapable of looking after themselves that things fuck out.
like, say, don’t operate machinery when you’re intoxicated – it’s fairly obvious.
don’t do it.
&, in Queendom, the Euphorians GET that.

that’s one of the reasons coaches are employed – 1. not to die in a car crash & 2. because it’s much more scenic & chill taking a coach & ultimately, 3. because horses are pretty cool.

there are, however, always a couple of crapheads who have it in their will to contaminate Queendom.
these Ignorant Folk are always captured & promptly hauled away to a place called Ochre Crescent.

Ochre Crescent is a town built in the crater of The Comet That Nearly Fucked Queendom Sideways.
[i’m speaking in metaphors here, people – see if you can figure it out ;]]
so, yes, it’s pretty logical to build a place of complete & utter banishment IN the cause of a previous eff-up.
#seewhatididthere [via @belindametb]

Ignorant Folk are humans & lower lifeforms who are UNAWARE OF THEIR COSMIC SITUATION & CHOOSE TO ENGAGE IN ANIMALISTIC/DEMONIC ACTIVITIES.
that kinda shit won’t fly in Queendom, so, they get banished.

& Queen won’t bat an eyelid because, honestly, she’s doing her life right now – she really can’t worry her little noggin about folks doing retarded things.

so, ja, that’s how Queendom was found.
Liz touches back on earth as a human from time to time but she sends her regards as she’s perfectly content in Queendom with the Euphorians.

& she loves you & you & you.
x

Poetry - The Massacre & Street King

because Queen has so many poems locked away & gathering dust, she decided to unveil them to Queendom.
these were written in the period between 2005 - 2007 [in human terms].
every now & then Queen will add two poems to her Inscriptions.
here are the first two:

The Massacre

A trail of red follows the man
Who drags a piece of limp
A bag of eyes are watching
The massacre; the bereavement of an innocent

A hanging in a store
The backroom scented with demise
A laceration, unfathomable
Carved into the flesh

A bare mass of muscle
Skin the swine, he said
A pool of life
It need not be, he said

A customer, gleeful and grinning
Takes a package, vacuum-packed
A butcher, blade still in hand;
‘That’ll be fifty-six ninety’

_____________________________

Street King

Red,

The colour of his throne,
The crate which supports his mass

Also,

The colour of his vacant eyes

The blind chap enthralls passersby
With cries of concord;
A trickle of content
For the unsatisfied core

It jingles in our ears
But affects our sight

And this,
Is how we become his minions,
And he remains the king of his empire;
A can of coins clasped in his hand.

The Adventure of Oppikoppi AKA The Happy Blur

Super Evil.
the track playing in Queendom at the mo & pretty much how the Day went down here too.

you see, Queendom & The Euphorians visited the much famed Oppikoppi this past Week-End & the whole of Paradise is more or less paralysed &or brainless because of the 4 Day Extravaganza.
it’s The Day After Koppi.

it started out with an airport visitationstation to collect @adoneandthesky’s bro, Eduan.

[ag fok, daar mors ek tee op my keyboard.]

insert Aandklas & a couple of beers & Queen runs into Hanu.
this was radical because we had confirmed to meet at koppi & hadn’t anticipated to see each other so soon.
Queen was once an avid myspace user [abuser] & that’s where they “met” & became pseudo [online] buddies.
it’s kind of awesome to know him IRL too.

he also saved me as “Liz MAL” on his phone.
i’m still not quite sure what to think about that.
side eye, Hanu, side eye.

so, anyway, frick!

we roll down the highway, Pie & Play & various other foodstuffs/campshit in our car vicinity.

We Arrive.
in the process of finding a spot/setting up our tent, Queen was called Lady Gaga [lady gawgaw in some accents – note; lower case] dos times.
i’ll take it.

Right Off The Bat The Drama Llama paid Queendom a visit.
what a harsh to my mellow.
sheesh.
we won’t go into that.

after all the commotion Queen was pretty much drunk/high/wired from start to finish.
eeexceleeent.
tbh, i really can’t remember much of the first day except running into an extremely happy @NatalieRoos every now & then [winkwink] & laughing my Proverbial Ass off with Judy & Korean [Karien] in a hammock.
everything was funny as fuck & a paradise-esque blur, basically.

@belindmetb made it pretty apparent after the first night that #tRons was about to consume our every being.
& wasn’t THAT the truth!

after consuming the entire globe’s Red Bull & Tequila, Queen didn’t #tRons… she WAS tRonsed.

the first brainmelt/bodyassault was provided by @HAEZER.
a shitload of epilepsy inducing strobes & craycray electro madness.
weirdly enough, Judy & i were right in front with our tRonsfists air-punching & completely missed @adoneandthesky & @belindametb who were, apparently, right in front too.

another EPIC highlight was experiencing @phfat for the second time evhur.
holyshitfuckballs.
having only seen them twice Queen can’t say she was disappointed & tbh, she probs won’t evhur be.
These Three Guys, Mike, Disco & Narch are The Cream of the Crop in SA & Queen’s pretty effing sure the rest of Earth will agree.

other rad-io acts i managed to catch was Gemma Ray, Mind Assault, @dyof & The Narrow & Dead Alphabet.

in between Judy & i spoke to a so-called “wise-guy/photog” but i managed to beat him with my wise-ness & i wasn’t even trying.
we spoke to sooo many effing drunk randoms & got to know their backgrounds.
Filed Under – Useless Fucking Info.

i failed on Billy Talent because by Day 3 my body felt like it had been hit with a million hammers with spikes WITH spikes all at once.
according to a Couple of Euphorians i didn’t miss much.

i also took mid-day naps much to the dislike of Two Very Drunk & Possibly High Euphorians.
the one’s name was Tert [no lies] & the other’s name was Adriaan a.k.a. AquaMan.
they took it upon themselves to keep me awake by talking all kinds of funny shit.
Queen didn’t mind – they were pretty cool.

every single Euphorian known to man also managed to point out that My Tent was falling apart.
my excuse was that “drunk people keep falling over it at night – it’s not my fault.”
that excuse didn’t work.
Queen was lazy as effffff to fix it & by Monday Morning she woke up with a tent on her face.
i reeeally walked into that one.

all in all it was a pretty sweet experience – the only downside was NOT BEING ABLE TO BREATHE for the duration of it.
yes, Queen’s The Dork With Allergies.

Queen’s back in her Castle & Life’s Okay – we’re not feeling quite hundreds yet.
memorable.
BUT
glad that it’s over.

sue me.

The Matter of Humans & Dead Dogs

“who’s first words were ‘can i take your order?’”
that’s Patrick asking Spongebob those very words.
it’s actually quite relevant to this Inscription because today The Queen’s sitting on Her Balcony sipping on a White Russian & Contemplating things.
things which are “humans & dead dogs”.

she’s listening to Poeticat, an “experimental/acoustic/lyrical” outfit.
basically like poetry being “rapped” over folky melodies.
it’s Beautiful & it’s possibly also influencing The Queen’s State Of Mind.
P.S. Catherine Martindale, you’re incredibly glorious in Doing What You Do.
an example of an Effing Cool Euphorian.
take notes, Children.

because, you see The Queen learns constantly.
sometimes She thinks she knows everything but She hardly knows Everything.
you know? ;]
it’s when you think you know Everything that you get Smacked At The Back Of The Head.
it’s when you think you know everything that you Slip Down Into Ignorance.

so, sometimes, that’s what happens to The Queen.
& it happens to every single Euphorian living in Queendom too, because, after all, when all Alternate Dimensions are removed we are… human [note; lower case] in This Life.

but that’s what being Human [note; uppercase] means.
there are animals & then there are Humans.
what’s the difference?
a Higher Consciousness.
so, wouldn’t you say that having a Higher Consciousness means that you as Human have an Obligation to transcend all animalistic behaviour [note; lower case] which concerns responding to the gross senses.

we also have the capacity to Enjoy on Another Level.

so, that’s what The Queen wants out of This Life – she wants to Enjoy & be Carefree of Woes which means that she has to Transcend Being Attached To Situations, People & Emotions.
funnily enough, She’s not attached to Condition Of Life but obviously prefers The High Life simply because why the hell not?
there’s no point in playing the martyr.

…
oh goodness.
I’m just having myself a Boards Of Canada Moment.
kay. done.

THUS,

that’s what causes The Queen’s utmost Downfall Via Ignorance – Attachment To Situations, People & Emotions.

these past couple of days – I don’t know how long it’s been – i’ve kind of been learning hard Lessons.
i mean, i’m not gonna go into them but it’s mostly about how i feel/interact/respond to Situations, People & Emotions.
my Karmic Path is The Way Of Release.
that is the Lesson i have to Learn & Apply in order to transcend material existence [note; lower case].
being weighed down is like having a dead dog on your shoulder talking to you.
you know it’s a load of shit but you listen anyway.

so, basically The Queen’s been Getting Rid Of Baggage.
She was locked up in The Library of Her Mind so that she could Focus & Bin Unwanted Thoughts & Memories.
well, it’s not so much binning as it is Accepting & Letting Go.
you know?
& while i might have been absent i sure as hell can tell you that i am a happier, peaceful person.
Queendom is Green & Sunny.

by Letting Go i’m literally lifting boulders off my Soul.
i feel lighter.
but i am learning – i’m not even close to being my utmost blissful self but i know how to get there, at least.
& that’s what keeps The Queen & Queendom & every Inhabitant going…
the mere idea that Queendom exists in a world free of Material Restraints.
& it’s always a party there.
always.

The Matter of Modes & The Adventure Of Monkey Island

it’s approximately in the vicinity of 4 o’ clock in the “afternoon” time-wise in Queendom.
The Soundtrack for this Inscription is Imogen Heap, Iron & Wine, Kate Havnevik & Pinback.
all these Bands/Musicianz are Quirky-Awesome-Chillvibez, a Music Genre in Queendom.

Queendom went through a bit of a dip [note; lower case] these past two weeks.
it’s because of The Queen – if the Queen lacks Emotional Swag, the whole of Queendom suffers because of it.
it’s pretty logical.
so, basically, The Queen experienced a Dip in Consciousness & slipped under The Control of The Modes Of Nature.
when this happens you have to submit to Karma, the no. uno Key Operator via The Modes of Nature, namely, Goodness, Passion & Ignorance.

luckily! The Queen only got entangled by the Karmic Repercussions of The Mode Of Passion.
one should nevereverever aspire to be under the Influence Of The Mode Of Ignorance.
this mode Illusions one COMPLETELY – like The Clouds covering Our Eyes & thus making us Not See The Sun but The Sun is Always Present whether you can See It Or Not.
like, not “getting” The Bigger Picture.

anyway, the point is:
The Queen was low on Energy, Inspiration, Transportation, Interest.
she let these Material Anxieties affect her Consciousness & quite honestly felt like a bit of a Demon.

Demons are entities operating IN FULL IGNORANCE.

it was quite kak.

BUT WHATEVZ, right?!

insert The Adventure of Monkey Island.
The Architecture set The Mood.
@adoneandthesky, @iaminsert, @setheron, ENA, JP & i entered a World of Theatrics & Musicalities.
filled with a sense of Wonder & Anticipation they set off on their Adventure…

The Queen almost felt At Home because of the SHEER epicness of this gorge Building.
lovely Staircases, high Ceilings, &… an Amphitheatre!
goodness me! it was like Falling In Love experiencing This Place via Space.
i saw past Its dilapidated Ceilings & Its desecrated Stage…
The Queen, instead, experienced, song, dance, audiences filling seats, actors pretending, applause, curtains…

this is why i, The Queen, have always felt that i might’ve been Royalty in past human lives [note; lower case].
i literally, visually, embark on this Journey when i experience anything remotely Belonging To That Era.

ANYWHOOO

we climb some stairs by playing Follow The Leader in The Dark.
The Queen is pretty blind when it comes to The Dark &things.

we proceeded to The Rooftop.
here @adoneandthesky, @iaminsert & a couple of Other Euphorians viewed Church Square from a whole other… almost “secret” Angle of Elevation.
The Queen was hiiigh in the Sky, once again, & this time it was Pattern Mania.
the cracks in the concrete, the repetition of the long, rectangular windows, the perfect placement of every street light.
it was Magical.


we while our Time away here, Taking Pictures in the Sky & Blazing In The Crisp Cold.

after this

we happen upon Festivities Galore – Mr. Sakitumi, Desmond & The Tutus [@setheron TOTALS won the bass guitar given away in an EPIC ching chong cha match] &…
OMG.
P.H.fat.
this is a band hailing from Cape Town in human terms [note; lower case].
description – bass, rap, experimental & in their own words “psychodelic”.
i find their custom word most descriptive because this is what happened to Queen Lizdom under the chaoticyetchill, voodoo-esque, inyourface spell of P.H.fat:

initially i was like… “kay, i’ve never experienced these dudes. let me give ‘em a chance.”
& chance-worthy they are indeed!
before The Queen knew it she & all the other Euphorians were reduced to bodies Droppin’ It & Keepin’ It Sick.
“I even recall PJ KOTZE stating “dis fokken AWESOME!!!”.
their Rhymes are impeccable, flowing easily & meshing at just the right level of grooving… in a Thug way, of course.
their beats stir your soul & almost “commands” your body, dictating its movements.
they. literally. blew. my. fuckin’. mind.
another factor which definitely enhanced The Queen’s experience of these Talented Euphorians was being Tuned In at exactly the right Frequency of Space.
[winkwink]
here’s a fuckin’ Low Five [‘cause that’s how imagine P.H.fat rolls] for you Dudes.
you deserve World Fame.
& you need to gig with Black Pimp’n Jesus.
#justsaying.

it was a Night Worth Remembering.
liefde vir jou, nag!

meanwhile, in Real Time, Queendom has opened its Doors to HANNAH FINN, an American from The San Francisco Area.
in just Two Days JUDY makes her Presence Known.
it’s gonna be a darling Winter in Queendom…

The Tale of The Oh So Mysterious @SVRPRWN

Brian Eno provides the soundtrack for This Inscription.
The Queen is feeling Ambience more than anything these past Few Days.
perhaps this is because she’s really at peace within Her Soul.
being happy Soul-Wise is very NB! because otherwise… you’re just a physical body.
& that’s exactly what you are when you’re dead.
that’s super sucky.
SO, basically, this album makes The Queen feel calm&collected in a Grimm Brothers Fairytale Kinda Way.

it’s a bit eerie… i reckon it’s one of Eno’s darker Albums.
said Album’s Title is The Shutov Assembly.
it’s effing good.

The Queen is merciful to her Loyal Euphorians – she relieves them from mediocrity by sharing Her Taste In SoundWavez.
please, Euphorians, do not be fooled by that human south african channel, mk [note, lower case], for it is QUITE shit.

NOW! let’s get down to matters at this Tea&Cake meeting, This Afternoon:

The Tale of The Oh So Mysterious @SVRPRWN.

who is @SVRPRWN?
no one knows – not even Alleged Acquaintances.
Ooooooooh Severe!

Once Upon A Time, an anon logged onto THE WEBBERNET.
more importantly, however, this anon Signed Up with The Largest Chatroom in The World.
Twitter.
this anon was @SVRPRWN – initially displaying a “profile pic” of some sturdy lookin’ fellow.
this “profile pic” was replaced by the one we all know & love.
or should i say “<3”.

see, this is what we DO know about @SVRPRWN:
he/she/it is exactly that – a hermz in cyberspace w/ 1 bewb 2 provz it.
@SVRPRWN speaks a cyber language that is “mad kiffz” & characterised by the frequent usage of “z’s” & cutting words short.

this is actually very intelligent because whilst some Tweeps might get aggro because of the Vandalising Of Language, the joke’s really on them:
you rarely have enough characters to say exactly what you want, right?
right.
@SVRPRWN has, thus, transcended Twitter by flipping the 140 Character Maximum the proverbial bird.

another factor which gives @SVRPRWN hermz’s [a pronoun used for hermz especially, in Queendom] Edge is hermz’s speaking to celebs [note, lower case] like their hermz’s bud.
this, of course, is not an act & @SVRPRWN is actually BFFs with most of them anyway.
@SVRPRWN humours hermz’s fans by giving them a glimpse of the VIP life.
it’s quite amazeballs & such.
a very Gracious Soul, this Euphorian @SVRPRWN.

The Queen is also very impressed by this Euphorian’s Taste In Chillwayvez.
the kind of Chillwayvez an entity listens to can convey a lot about his/her/it’s Soul.
like, if you listen to something kak… The Queen will have her reservations about you.
it’s not judging.
it’s common sense.
Chillwayvez is Part of The Universal Form – like, you either flow with It, or you keep on making a racket to your own beat.
the latter is Not Cool.

anway, so, @SVRPRWN also “gets” the Zombie Apocalypse, “Chillin’ Hard W/ Gurl Broz/Broz”, MJ, Gagz, &&& That Human Life Ain’t That Serious.

thus, The Queen has come to the conclusion that @SVRPRWN ought to be made Honorary Hermz in Queendom.
it’s an Exclusive Position & One Of A Kind as there can only be one.
it’s sort of like a Jester but only Kewler & not derogatory at all.
basically, this Position is meant for someone funny & @SVRPRWN is HELLA FUNNY, YALLZ!

for those of you who are STILL In The Dark about this Phenoma…
sigh…
let Queen Mama explain:
it’s an act, a persona.
it’s like Lady Gaga & Die Antwoord & Jack Parow.
for those of you who think those three performers are being serious… um…
whatever.
the point is!
have fun conversing with @SVRPRWN & play along!
act completely serious because hermz’ is totals serious.
as serious as not being serious.

that is all.
follow @SVRPRWN for a UNIQUE Twitter Experience.

The Tale of The Herbz & someothermatters

right, so, The Royal Banquet just happened in Queendom – a lovely beef stew with peppers, green beans, avo & chutney was had by all Euphorians.
it was yumcious BUT now The Queen is perplexed.

in an effort to return to her Once Healthy Ways, The Queen decided not to munch on any Junk.
it worked out quite well & she felt a teeny tiny better than usual but now, after Dinner, The Queen is still hungry after a full bowl of food.
does she wait 20 minutes for Her Brain to register that she is satisfied or does she simply have a worm inside her belly munching&crunching all of her nummiez?

the thought of worms in my stomach officially grossed me out to the Stretches of Eternity.
holy goodness.

that was ALL besides the point.
the point is that The Queen is listening to Tycho, a daaarling Musical Outfit.
it’s electro ambience & it has helped me be a better Queen in oh so many ways.
Boards Of Canada & Tycho will always remain two of The Queen’s favez.
that’s just how she rolls.

This Inscription deals with many matters.
the first being:

The Matter of Plants as Intelligent Lifeforms.

Euphorian @m0zase commented that my talking about plants & such is very “arb”.
in most cases plants aren’t of the Highest Interest Ranking but in Queendom, Herbal Residents, or Herbz [not to be confused with human herbs [note, lower case]], as they more commonly referred to, are of the Most Important inhabitants.

Herbz make Queendom beautiful & aromatic.
over a billion Herbz can be found in Queendom.
The Queen & Euphorians alike have immense respect for Herbz & do dances each morning to offer their gratitude.
these are called Dawn Discos.

you see, there are three kinds of Herbz – those that offer themselves to be eaten by Euphorians [thus, The Dancing & gratitude], those that exist purely for Beauty Purposes & the Production Assistance Concerning Honey [thus, The Dancing & gratitude] & those who are foul & just muck other Herbz up.
the latter are known as Mean Greeniez.
Mean Greeniez reside in The Tjoekie to further irritate Imbeciles in their One-Hour Stays.

today, though, The Queen became painfully aware of just HOW ALIVE Herbz really are.
winkwink, @TheFilmo.
Herbz reside in a very weird “Density Arrangement” – their existence is conducted in Immensely Dense Earth & also, Less Dense Air but still Dense Because Of Gravity.
see, they live in a COMPLETE other dimensional frequency, so, while you may think in your silly human form that “oh, look, a pretty flower” that flower is actually performing Activities Of Life [eating, drinking &… get ready for this… even SINGING].
that is one of the reasons, besides being visually pleasing & great smell-wise, that we are so attracted to the idea of Flowers.
The Queen has actually experienced Floral Herbz sing…

do yourself a favour, Euphorian, & get up at Dawn… have a Dawn Disco & then calm yourself.
situate yourself in a Meditative Position & just concentrate on the Universal Vibrations.
you WILL hear the Floral Herbz singing a song ESPECIALLY for you.
it is QUITE fantastical & no, no drahgz are needed for this operation.
only a Clear Consciousness [not the same as conscience] & a will to participate in The Universal Form.

that’s the thing with humans [note, lower case] – they are utterly & completely STUPIDLY oblivious to the FANFUCKINGTASTICAL MAGIC happening ALL AROUND them CONSTANTLY.
that’s why lizdom became The Queen of Queendom because she’d rather live in her Magical Wonderland than associate with humans on such an effing retarded level.

humans ARE welcome in Queendom, though.
the moment that they #besef their Position In The Universe & thus, Act Accordingly.
once again, it basically comes down to #moenieipoesweesnie.
when this transition is made, said human becomes known as an Euphorian & a resident of Queendom.

another matter that needs attending is that of Vitamin Water.
The Queen is absolutely appalled by the mere idea of it.
in this very Moment In Time The Queen is Unconvinced that Vitamin Water might be anything more than glorified cooldrink.
BUT according to a couple of Euphorians, Vitamin Water ACTUALLY contains some Health Properties, so, in an attempt to become As Healthy As Can Be, The Queen will be conducting an experiment on said Product.

i will be consuming one Container of Vitamin Water a day, each day trying a different one, for two weeks.
i will combine this with eating healthily too.
after this stint i will eat exactly as before but only replace the Vit W with regular water.
i will record every detail & Write About It in a month’s Time.

another exciting event in Queendom is that of a Euphorian who undertook a Mission in recording the effects of a specific strain of Herbz [the happy-inducing kind].
this will also Be Written About in the very near future.

that is all from Queendom this day.
excuse me while i lose myself in some Tycho.